


Bel Ami

by the-canary (siruru)



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Modern: No Powers, Awkward Flirting, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Denial of Feelings, Developing Friendships, Developing Relationship, Eventual Romance, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Mutual Pining, Party, Protective Bucky Barnes, Serendipity - Freeform, Service Dogs, Slow Dancing, Strangers to Lovers, Time Skips, Unresolved Romantic Tension, War Veteran Bucky Barnes, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings, brief meetings
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-08
Updated: 2019-08-13
Packaged: 2019-10-06 20:20:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 15,081
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17351954
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/siruru/pseuds/the-canary
Summary: You had bigger fish to fry in NYC between your new job, living in a new city and old friends. You were sure in over your head, but who’s that cute stranger that keeps helping you out?





	1. crash into me.

**Author's Note:**

> this is for @sgtjbuccky‘s writing challenge. there is a little mix going around the prompt, but i hope you enjoy it anyways.
> 
> Prompt: Person A: “Okay, I have something to confess… I like you. I have for the past two years now and it’s been killing me to hold it in this long but I think you deserve to know.” Person B: “You nerd, we’ve been dating for the past two years.
> 
> Feedback is always welcomed.

_ “Steve, seriously. It would help a whole bunch.” _

_ “I know it would, Buck. I’ve been trying to help you all goddamn summer, but if it’s not her eyes then it’s her voice, if it’s  not the way she talk or doesn’t talk. I think I’ve set you up with all of Brooklyn, but you’re---” _

_ “I’m what, Stevie?” Bucky laughs as Steve just shakes his head, ready to to tell the truth to his best friend though they both know what he meant, “You can say it.” _

_ “You’re the pickiest bastard I know.” _

* * *

_ \--Meet you there at 2:30.  _

That was the last thing Wanda had sent you before your phone became a lost item on the trains between New York City and Syracuse, and it wasn’t like you hadn’t gone to the big city before but with a job interview and meeting up with Wanda. Well, you were freaking out in the middle of the street, as you can feel the anxiety starting to bubble up. You had felt you had done well on the interview, but not being able to find this stupid little cafe on the large map you had bought was starting to get to you. 

It wasn’t helping that you were getting bashed from all directions. New Yorkers really were the worst.

“Hey, watch where you’re going!”

It’s the last thing you hear before someone pushes you into someone else, which leads to hot coffee being splashed all over your large map and some even on your dark colored skirt. There is

some cursing, but the person --you’re already losing them to the maze of people all around you-- is already gone as you stand near the edge of the buildings, ready to cry and unsure of what to do next. 

_ Why did Wanda want to meet now of all times? _

You flex your fingers a couple of times, trying to gain control of your breathing as you feel a hand on your shoulder as you glance to your right to see blue eyes giving you a worrying look, as the dog --a mix of brown and white with a blue “service dog” jacket on-- gives out a worried whine. 

“You all right?” he questions as you give him a stiff nod, unsure of what he wants, “Daisy noticed someone having a panic attack and she lead me to you.” 

“I--Thank you,” is the only thing you manage to say after a good while, before giving the man a weary smile. Daisy is sitting down, as she keeps watch on you for any further sign of distress. 

“Do you need any help with anything else?” the man questions once more, as you find yourself looking for the answer for the moment between getting lost, the panic attack, and now staring at his gorgeous man --I mean, wearing a leather jacket while walking a dog should pretty much be illegal with his good looks-- you weren’t unsure of what to say without looking like a complete fool.

“Do you know where the Piccolo Cafe is located?” you finally manage to state, as you move your skirt and blouse around for a bit as you try to move the sting of the coffee around just a bit. You know that you’ll have to look at your legs later to see if there were any lasting burns aside from your bruised ego, as the handsome stranger gives you a worried look for a moment. 

However, your glare and pursed lips tells him that you don’t want him pitying you in any sort of way. 

“Oh yeah,” he moves forward with his directions as he points a few blocks down, “Just got two blocks down and one to your right. It’ll be on the corner.”

“Oh thank you!” you declare as relief begins to wash over you at the realization that you aren’t that far away from where you were supposed to meet Wanda. The man can’t help but shake his head at your sudden enthusiasm, as Daisy whines just a little bit telling him that they are running behind on time.  

“The whole city is a grid system, you’ll get used to it,” the stranger explains with a bright smile that leaves you dazzled for a moment, “Well, I’ve gotta take her back but I hope you manage to find it!” 

“Sure,” you say before thanking him once more and heading down the street and towards your destination -- hoping that Wanda hasn’t been waiting too long.

“You did a good job, girl,” the stranger finally states after watching you leave, while patting Daisy on her head before turning around and head back to the training center. 

However, this incident doesn’t leave either of you for a very long time. 


	2. second meetings.

_ “It’s not funny, Steve!” _

_ “You can’t blame, I really thought you and Nat were going to hit it off -- only for her ex to walk in. You’ve gotta be cursed or something, punk ‘cause you’ve been pinning over her for awhile now.”  _

_ “Not really--” _

_ “Are you actually going to answer that way after years of trying to set a date with her? Please, Buck, what suddenly changed?”  _

_ “The girl I--” _

_ “Oh, the lost coffee girl.”  _

_ “Yeah.”  _

* * *

 

You don’t understand how you manage to forget such an important item. It might be due to the lack of sleep, or the stress of coming up with the second part of your rent now that the end of the month was rapidly approaching and you had accumulated some unexpected expenses. It could also be that one of your roommates had taken the blasted thing when they left for their own journey in the pouring rain. And while you were used to running around in the rain without an umbrella, it was a completely different story working a few blocks down back in Syracuse than to taking the subway from where you lived into Midtown.

“Move it,” you holler and push through the torrent of rain and people trying to get onto the bus after a dismal ride on the subway, but you were going to get there early at least, hopefully...if traffic wasn’t too bad.  

Slowly and surely you were getting used to New York.

* * *

 

You realize that you have a multitude of problems when you head into the office, aside from arriving twenty minutes late and soaking wet. Your boss isn't there in the first place leading to you having to attend all her meetings, while you understand how it could be with a sick child --you babysit a lot in your younger years-- it was still annoying as hell that you were going to have to push aside your growing pile of work for this. You end up running to the other side of the building to attend the 10am meeting as fast as you with sloppy boots and wet hair ruining your vision, as you try your hardest to find an empty chair.

“Thank you for finally joining us,” a voice on the front declares in the dark lit room as the presentation is more than halfway through. You swear you hear some chuckles here and there, but all you can do is sigh as you move forward with taking some notes for your boss and the rest of the department. 

* * *

 

It’s 2:30 pm when you finally get the chance to think about lunch, though you are fully aware that you hadn’t brought anything and there was no way in hell that you were going to leave the building in order to get something from that cafe you enjoyed when you had a little extra cash. That only left one other place -- the building cafeteria. Thus, with a groan you get up from your desk and proceed to head to the one of the many lobbies within the building that housed said cafeteria. 

Now, it wasn’t that you hated the place, the building had some great meals though they tended to be a little more on the expensive side and as you reached the 10th floor -- the noise and bustle that came with all kinds of office people taking in lunch hit you head on. 

You groan and make a quick sweep of the kitchen area before deciding to get something from the grill. The head cook --Scott, from what his name tag read-- gives you a bright smile that you are barely able to return. 

“What will you have today?” he states, as you vaguely murmur what you usually have as he proceeds to work. Two other people come to stand in line with you, as Scott gives the same greeting though a bit brighter when a male voice answers back. You have to pause for a moment making sure that it’s not just a hallucination until you hear a bark. 

“Are you okay?” the man’s voice is soft, as you feel a hand on your arm as if trying to steady you. Scott pauses for a moment, as you keep hearing more of the dog noise from somewhere, but your head suddenly feels too heavy to look down. 

“I...don’t think so,” you state, as the voice begins to come in and out a bit more. There are shivers going up and down your arm from where his much warmer hand is holding you as you finally glance to your right side and see concerned blue eyes and a sort of familiar face, though with fully grown beard on it now. 

“Do you need anything?” he keeps on asking, but slowly his voice is starting to turn to static as your eyes feel heavy, just like the rest of your body,  “Water? Cold medicine?” 

“It’s okay,” you feel like you are trying to say, but at the same time the stuffing in your mouth might be working against you, “Please don’t worry so much.” 

“I--” 

* * *

You don’t get the chance to figure out the cute dog walker is saying as you black out completely.

“Hey,” you hear Wanda’s fuzzy as you slowly begin to open your eyes once more, “How are you feeling?” 

“What happened?” you groan out, as you manage to sit up just a little before sinking back down onto the little cot that you have placed in. You look around to see that you are in one of the medical offices that are housed in the building, as you turn to meet Wanda’s worried brown eyes. 

“They told me that you passed out in the cafeteria and someone brought you here,” Wanda explains as she tries her hardest to seem stern with you, “It seems you got sick from the rain and overworking these past couple of weeks.” 

“Yeah, everything’s been pretty crazy,” you state vaguely, as she simply shakes her head though she knows that taking your umbrella before she left probably didn't help the situation either, but she wouldn’t tell you that for now. 

“Well, they let you take the rest of the day off and if you need anymore you could just call,” Wanda explains a bit more as you nod numbly, as you search for an sign of blue eyes and a brown and white dog. 

Wanda eyes you curiously for a moment before you ask: “How did I get here exactly?”

“The guy standing next to you carried you here,” Wanda answers back as you are left awestruck for a moment, but say nothing else on the subject as you proceed to get up --Wanda had already gotten your things from your office-- and head home for the last hour of the work day.  

However, on the entire way back home, you couldn’t help but wonder if the person that had helped you was the dog walker from before and whether you would get to see him again -- at least, just to thank him. 


	3. a lovely gal.

**2 months later.**

_ “Oh, come on Bucky! You love going to singles’ night.” _

_ “Yeah, dude. I don’t see what’s the problem now?”  _

_ “I just don’t feel like going. I just don’t know anymore.”  _

_ “Buck, you know this isn’t helping your situation at all, right?”  _

_ “I know, but---” _

_ “Come on, Romeo. Maybe, your sleeping beauty might be there tonight. I mean New York is a pretty big place.”  _

* * *

Bucky sighs as Sam pushes him into his room to get ready, Steve giving him a simple shrug and laugh.

“Come on,” Wanda states with a smile as she goes through your closet, “We haven’t celebrated you coming to New York. You’re always so busy.” 

“Well, sometimes work just plies on,” you explain vaguely as she pulls clothes out as they hit your small bed, “And I was dying for awhile, ya know?"

Wanda laughs as she finds that cute dark-colored dress that she knows that you used when you out together and cause a riot. She holds it up to her neck and shakes the hanger just a little, as you start laughing at how hard she is trying -- but, deep down you know she has a point, that you could use a break from all the stuff work and life in general have been piling up on you, regardless of you ever finding that cute dog walker guy. 

“New York hasn’t met you yet,” she remarks with a sly smile as you get up and grab the dress.

“Is Pietro paying?” 

“As always!” 

You laugh and proceed to get ready for your first night out in a very long time.  

* * *

 

However, it ends up being the other way around as you end up alone and nursing a drink in the middle of the bar, both twins having gone their separate ways to find someone to dance with or trade some drinks over with. Though you were sure that you weren’t used to late nights in NYC than the other way around because everyone around you was dressed to the nines with great makeup on, as they danced to some shitty tech or barely understandable music that at this point was slowly starting to give you a headache. 

Even now, you were still learning that New York was a completely different beast than from all the places you had lived in before. It was annoying and frustrating, and in your general boredom you weren’t paying attention that someone had been trying to get your attention for a good couple of minutes. 

It wasn’t until you swirled your chair, ready to find Wanda or tell her that you were leaving when you are met with a pair of bright blue eyes. 

“Hi,” he states breathlessly, almost as if he had been running, as you just sit there for a moment -- unsure if Wanda was some type of witch or you were just hallucinating at this point. And  while, he looked a bit different from the last time you had really seen him --short hair with his beard a bit shorter than before-- the crooked smile and those baby blues -- you knew them anywhere. 

“Hey,” you state as calmly as you can because you don’t want to seem too over excited over a guy that you didn’t even know and had only meet once. However, there was just something about him that you couldn’t get over. 

He ends up taking the seat next to you and orders a drink from the bartender, as you keep staring at him like he might disappear at any minute. He rubs the back of his neck before moving forward with his next sentence and hoping that he doesn’t sound like some type of weirdo or stalker. 

“Are you feeling better?” he manages to ask over the music as your eyes widen, understanding what he means and that this is probably your third meeting, “You looked pretty bad the last time I saw ya.” 

“I am okay, they made me take a week off,” you laugh a little nervously before taking a sip of your own drink, “But, thank you for saving me twice now.” 

He grins and you feel your heart stutter for a moment.

* * *

 

“Did he really do that?” you exclaim with a laugh at Bucky’s story, as he simply nods and doubles over with his own laughter at the memory of a much younger Steve sucker punching the captain of the football team back in the day before his asthma kicked in. 

“Stevie’s always been the saving damsels sort of type,” Bucky adds in after taking a breath of air, as you give him a bright smile. 

“I’m guessing you have that in common, huh?” you can’t help but tease him, as he shakes his head.

You can’t help the grin at the blush, from either the drinking or because of what you had said, that blooms on his face before he looks away . You wonder if he could feel the same type of fluttering emotion like you were at the moment, but you were also cautious about sharing any of your own personal information with him. I mean, you doubted that his name was even Bucky, who would name their child that, especially such a gorgeous man. However, before you could open your mouth and start off with your story --you had been sharing in turns since he had come over when you saw something red running your way. 

“W _ e gotta go _ ,” Wanda declares in a panic as she grabs your arm, completely ignoring the man sitting next to you, “Pietro decided to pick a fight with some big guy in the back.” 

“ _ Shit _ ,” is the only thing that you manage to say as Wanda pulls you to get up and move towards the exit. You give the mysterious stranger a smile and wave, as he stands there in confusion for a moment.

“Hey, can I at least have your name?” Bucky yells in desperation, but he can’t the fleeting feeling in his chest at the sight of your smile. You laugh and simply shrug because even though you could yell it out, you doubted he would be able to hear you over all this loud music. 

Bucky could only watch as he lost sight of you in the crowd full of people, completely unaware of a certain blond tapping him on the shoulder. And from that moment, Steve knew that Bucky was trapped -- he just didn’t know in what yet


	4. the meaning of certain intentions.

_ “If you know where she works, why don’t you just go visit her there?”  _

_ “It’s not that easy, birdbrain.” _

_ “Well why not?” _

_ “Cause Natasha, Dot, and Stacy and--” _

_ “Did you date the entire 35th floor, Bucky?” _

* * *

It takes you a little while to notice, about a month since you had last seen him, that sometimes he’s sitting in the back. By his side, Daisy sits at the end of the table diligent and making sure that there is nothing bothering him or anything that might scare the man. However, she could still use a little training since she wags her tail the first time she sees you, Bucky doesn’t see you due to his head being hidden behind his laptop.

You smile and head out with your drink and coffee, thinking it might be a good day. 

It happens another two times before Daisy in all her eagerness barks as you leave, catching Bucky’s attention though you are already out the door by then. 

It takes Bucky, he’s ready and glancing up every three seconds, the third time to catch you leaving to ger caught your line of sight and allow him to give you a wave before you’re out the door. It’s silly, but it’s like him and Daisy are your little good luck charms to start the day off right -- and it has been for a good while as Maria seems to be enjoying your work and everything is under your control for once. 

But, you want to go beyond small and quick instances with Bucky, as you remember his laugh from the club and miss Daisy from the very first time that she had helped you. Thus, you try to make fate work for you for once.

It’s Saturday morning, Bucky knows that you aren’t going to be here but that doesn’t stop him. 

* * *

The little cafe is close enough to your place of work that he gets to see you most days, with a wave and a smile as you head out, and close enough to the training location that both Daisy and him can get in their walk. However, now isn’t one of those days, but he has gotten so used to walking this way, it has slowly become part of his routine, it was etching himself into his mind just like you had.

“Ah, so you are here,” the voice causes his heart to stop as he glances from his paperback --it’s always  _ All is Quiet on the Western Front  _ when he can’t sleep well-- to see you in a sweater and jeans. There is a coffee in your hand and bright smile on your face, as Bucky swears his heart stops for a second. 

“Is this seat taken?” you ask softly, meeting wide blue eyes as he shakes his head and motions for you to sit down. Neither of you can hide the smiles glowing onto your faces, though you can’t help but ask. 

“And where’s Daisy today?” 

“Back at her training location for lessons,” Bucky explains, as you nod before taking a bite out of your still warm pastry.  

“So, is that what you work in?” you can’t stop your curiosity when it comes to knowing more about this man that has saved you one too many times since you had arrived in New York, “Work in training service dogs?” 

“It’s something I volunteer in,” he answers back vaguely as you nod. Even if you had seen each other from time to time, you were still strangers but you wanted to change that and as Bucky leaned in a little more -- you hoped he did to.

“So, do you come here often?” you question trying to ease the tension from the last question, as his blue eyes glimmer. He puts the book aside and his attention is fully on you now. 

“Every now and then to see a certain pretty face,” Bucky gives you a crooked smile before moving into asking what you do for a living and while Pietro’s voice is ringing in your head in slight worry ( _ This all sounds like the start of YOU, I hope you know that),  _ you find yourself not really caring. 

You end up ordering a piece of cake and staying until noon when Wanda calls you to come back home due to the pipes bursting, much to you freaking out and running out on Bucky -- though this time to his amusement. 

* * *

However, deep down, Bucky does know where you work -- knows it like the back of his hand though not because due the reasons that have Pietro worried when he first heard of your story. It’s just that your place (that large ass skyscraper) of work had been within the Barnes Conglomerate for a very long time, even if James didn’t have any connection to it until last summer. 

He plays with the cuffs of his suit in anxiety as his mother gives him a worried frown, “I’m sure they’ll welcome you with open arms. Don’t worry so much, James.”

“That’s not what I’m worried about, Ma,” he lets out in a deep breathe because even though he should be worried about the stocks and how his new employees would think of him. He was just thinking of how you would react to him not being there this morning and to all of this in the end.

“We can talk about the second part of your father’s will later, dear,” Winifred tries to calm him down, but James just lets a hand run through his hair in distress. 

_ Oh, he hadn’t forgotten about that part either.  _

“You’ll do just fine,” Winnie murmurs before kissing his cheek. He gives her a brief smile as someone calls his name from the other side of the door and he takes another deep breathe.

“--Please everyone meet the new owner of the building, Mr. James Buchanan Barnes.”

James comes out shining, while staring at his cute marshmallow cuffs --the 23rd he had gone through this morning alone-- as the rest of the floor claps. A few choice words and he thanks everyone for being there. It’s towards the end that he finally finds you, next to a dark-haired woman, with wide eyes before he disappears once more. 

Bucky can’t help the dread he goes through once more as he enters the elevator with his mother to meet the next tenants of the tower.     
  


 


	5. the way things play out.

**1 week later.  
**

_“So, she stopped showing up to the cafe?”_

_“Yeah, but I don’t blame her…What with the whole owner of where you work thing.”_

_“Buck, you seem really hungover this though. Are you sure you aren’t feeling more?”_

_“…”_

* * *

It takes you a month to fully comprehend what you saw that morning when Bucky, whose real name was James Buchanan Barnes, had walked into your office. From what you understood, his family –an old New York family that had been building their money for years– owned the whole building and several other within a block radius. No, James wasn’t the head hancouch of where you worked –the owner subleased the floor– but he was a man with money and a great deal of power. You had also heard that he had dated several other woman that had caught his attention within the building over the years – it was pass time of his.

It was extremely hard to place the picture of Bucky, sweet and cautious, along with Daisy with the one that James Buchanan Barnes that everyone seemed to be rumoring about.

The man hadn’t been seen in years, only until a few months back when his father passed away did he really starts to show up once more. You wondered if at one point he had seen you and decided to reach out when you got sick, if you were meant to be a new game for him now that he had came back to reclaim the throne of the Barnes Conglomerate.

It’s too much to think about and deep down it hurts, so you decide to push it all away. You’re a little sad, but your world isn’t meant for millionaires and playboys, so you close the book on ever meeting or seeing Bucky again.  

* * *

“Have you thought about it?” Winnie frowns as she notices that her son isn’t paying any attention to him, “You aren’t even listening, James.”

“No,” Bucky sighs out as he pets Daisy who simply looks at him with those big, blue eyes of hers, “You want a fundraising gala set up an attempt to find me a girlfriend. I know, I know.”

Blue meets blue as James gives his mother a defeated smile that can’t help her but make her pause. He had been like this for days, since they had gotten a tour of one of his father’s older buildings. Winnie knew that her son hadn’t been the same since coming back home from his tours of service all those years ago – the charming, trade of all jacks, womanizer was gone and replaced with a more somber man. Due to this, George had decided to keep his son’s interactions with the family’s holdings to a limit and let him follow his own pursuits – to wait until the time was right once more, though that had come sooner rather than later as George passed away early last summer.

James had been told to step up once more, but it caused more anxiety than anything else, especially with the last clause that his father had written out for him – even in death George Barnes was still an eccentric.

“Is there something wrong with that?” Winnie can’t help but ask as she crosses the small Manhattan apartment that Bucky called his own, “I just worry about you, dear. It seems like you lost something.”

Bucky can’t help the laugh that escapes him at how intune his mother could still be with him: “Yeah, something like that.”

“Was it the dog foundation again?” Winnie asks, because the thing that seemed to take up most of her son’s time beforehand was the dog training service non-profit that he helped with.

Sometime after he came back, he thought about getting a service dog to help but instead found himself researching and getting the necessary license to help volunteer and train the animals – like he was doing with Daisy at the current moment, who just stood still from at his side. Bucky shakes his head before passing a hand through his face in annoyance, trying to find the right words to everything.

“I think I fell for a gal I’ve been having those meetings with,” Bucky explains as Winnie gives him a confused look, “By accident, we run into each other from time to time.”

“I could see how that could be a problem,” Winnie nods in understanding. I mean, if they only saw each other from time to time – there was no way that Bucky could really get her number or anything. His mother knew and understood that he wasn’t the charmer that made a lineup of girls sigh at his feet.

“That isn’t the main problem in all this, ma,” Bucky explain a bit more, as Winnie waits in silence, “I saw her the other day at the Tower, she works there.”

Winnie can’t help but let out a mix of a scoff and groan at her son’s revelation before placing a sympathetic hand on his shoulder: “ Goodness, James. You never learn.”

“I really don’t’, ma. I really don’t.”

And with that, Winnie can’t help but keep moving forward with the plan for the fundraising gala.

* * *

However, fate seems to know that you are calling out to each other – at least, Bucky is in the way he thinks about constantly since you stopped going to your shared cafe after the first week. The worry of whether you would reject him if he ever sought you out gave him sleepless nights and fatigue that he wasn’t sure how handle – just a few chance meetings and Bucky could tell he was lovesick, even if he wasn’t supposed to be.

You, on the other hand, were more tamed about your pinning and while you saw things that reminded you of Bucky and Daisy in the month that followed – you could still move on without much else in mind. You ignored that your heart lurched for a quick second.

However, fate is cruel to lovers that try to ignore that nature order of things, as you end up getting caught in the rain on Saturday afternoon with no umbrella and trying to save yourself underneath a large tree.

You’re shivering and cold when you see it – a man and a dog (wearing a bright green raincoat)  making it down the road your way with an umbrella at hand.  You’re ready to yell out and ask for some help until you see who it really is.

Blue eyes meet your own, as Bucky heads towards your direction and placing the umbrella directly underneath you, as the dog – a black and brown Lab mix looks up.

“Hey, are you okay?” he rushes forward, clearly not noticing who you are until you are face-to-face and the thought that he is willing to help anyone makes you smile for a brief moment. His eyes widen, as you move back for a moment, causing him to frown.

“Let’s get out of the rain,” Bucky pleas softly, as you look at him and then at the dog. He looks at you and lets out a little huff of air, almost as if annoyed, “I think Luke agrees too.”

“Okay, I’ll listen to Luke,” you throw him a bone as Bucky grins before leading you through Central Park. The walk is cold, lonely, and quiet as it seems that the park has emptied just a little due to the weather, but there was always people here and there but due to your lack of talking, it seemed lonelier than it should be.  

“Thank you,” you finally state timidly as you look up ahead halfway through your walk, as Bucky simply nods. It’s then you admit shyly: “I lost track of time at the library and I still can’t find my umbrella.”

“It’s a good thing that I found you then,” Bucky lets out awkwardly as you simply nod.

You nod in agreement, making out of Central Park along the way, before asking: “Is he another trainee?”

“Yup,” Bucky declares like a proud summer while look at the raincoat-clad dog, “Daisy is getting graduate, so they gave me a new pup to train.”

You can’t help but stare at him for just a moment, as a familiar thought raises from the back of your mind since you had heard all those rumors about him from the office ladies back at work.  

Doesn’t it hurt to move from one person to the other so quickly?

However, instead saying anything you let Bucky go on about how a good boy Luke is in his training and how Daisy has been doing. It almost reminds you of the last time you had seen him at the cafe before the “big reveal” and just how warm and caring Bucky seemed to people towards animals. And you too, is something that your heart added as an afterthought, but you ignored it as Bucky stopped in front of a bistro place and looks at you.

“Are you hungry?” he questions, “We could sit here and wait until the rain stop. I know they allow dogs.”

There’s a pleading look in his eyes, as Luke’s tail seems to start wagging over the smell whatever is cooking inside and why you want to say no – that you should be heading into a minimarket, buying yourself an umbrellas, and heading home. Instead, you brush your hair back and nod. Bucky nods as you both enter and head towards the back.

He grabs you a menu before you sit in a medium booth with Luke standing near the end of the table. It might be because you’re out of the rain or that you actually agreed to eat with him, but there is something brighter and more carefree shining in Bucky’s face as he watches you gloss over the menu. There are a million things he could be saying or asking in this moment, but he goes with the safest.

“I know there might a lot of things running through your head right now,” he starts off as you give him a brief glance, trying to stay as calm as possible, “And I am willing to answer all your questions, but you have to promise me one thing.”

“What?” you dare to question, as Bucky pulls his hand out in front of you. Luke watches the interaction quietly.

“Friends?” Bucky questions, and that’s when you really look at him. He gives you bright but strained smile, trying his hardest to keep you in his life in some way, while push back the thought of just how cute you look in that moment.

You bite your lip for a brief moment and Bucky swears that he’s done for. However, your voice breaks his thought.

“Okay, Bucky,” you relent and pull out your own hand to shake his, “Friends.”

You smile as Bucky lets out a loud, relieved laugh before telling you that you could order anything you want on the menu and that Luke was getting a big steak – much to the dog’s excitement.

It was a step on a different direction, but for now at least you still had each other.  


	6. things are a changin'.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if i timed this all correctly, welcome to the end of the first year of the main character knowing bucky, as according to the prompt. get ready as we head into the 2nd half of the story ;D

_“You really told her that you just wanted to be friends, huh?”_

_“Yeah, it’ll work better that way what with the will and mom.”_

_“You’re a fucking dumbass, Barnes.”_

_Bucky frowns as Sam just shakes his head, even without knowing the poor girl he could tell that his idiot of a friend was in love with her. Sam could only wonder how it would take them it figure it all out._

* * *

You don’t get to see Bucky for awhile after that, though he does explain a lot of things about his family’s business in real estate and how he is currently trying to find a girlfriend due to some strange note left in his father’s will. Bucky was the eldest and for everything to work out in the end for his mother and sisters, it was something that he needed to go through – even if it was annoying.

_“The only exception is that I can’t date anybody that works within our building,” Bucky groans out of if trying to test the waters out with something, but all you do is nod as a sense of relief bubbles within you chest for a brief moment._

_“You were a real womanizer once, I’m guessing?” you can’t help but remark with a laugh as Bucky winces behind his drink, so that you don’t catch it._

_“Once,” he states solemnly, while staring at you for a long while._

After that dinner, you had meet the next weekend as well though Bucky didn’t seemed like he usually self and he didn’t have either Daisy or Lucas with him. Instead, you listened to him complain about how his mother was organizing a fundraising gala to find him a long-standing relationship – it was cruel in some ways but he understood the necessity in others. Anyone who was anyone (alongside with some tenants from the varying Towers were going to be there as well), what was Bucky said and you couldn’t help but feel inadequate when it came to the type of life that he lived.

You couldn’t understand him, much less support him as he went through all of this. It was sad, but the image you had of the quiet, helpful stranger you had meet all those months back was slowly changing and you didn’t know how to feel about it, much less what to do.

But, you knew one thing, even with the vow of friendship between the two of you – you stop seeking Bucky –no,  ** _James Buchanan Barnes_**  out.

* * *

A couple of weeks turn into a month and a half and Bucky can’t help but wonder what the he did wrong again. He was sure that he had cleared up and missing conception that you might have of him, but whatever he had said only seem to have made it worst since he only saw you when he sometimes made rounds around the floor that you worked on, and even then it was only rarely with his head down.

He had been thinking about it for days, telling both Steve and Sam his thoughts on all of its and while they both weren’t giving him any answers, they both knew deep down where this was going to go.

“You know,” Sam starts, watching Bucky and his endless mopping as the game goes into commercials, “You probably scared her off.”  

“What?” Bucky asks, “What do you mean?”

“I mean,” Sam sighs out as blue eyes keep watching his every move, though the older man had to admit that Bucky was sometimes even worse than Steve when it came to the love and understanding department, “She sees you as this man who walk dogs, at most and then her mental image does a complete 360 that you’re this millionaire heir in the making.”

“But, I’m–” Bucky chimes in only to stop when Sam gives him the look. Bucky closes his mouth about whatever he was going to say because Sam is telling the truth.

Bucky had wanted you so much in his life, to not lose you that he spilled out everything without a thought about your own thought process and how you were going to handle everything. You were just a regular gal from a sleepy city, of course it would be too much for you to handle. Bucky frowns at his own careless stupidity that only lead to thinking about himself once more.

“If you wanna keep any gal longer than just a one night stand,” Sam reprimands him out of his self-loathing thoughts, “You gotta stop thinking about yourself.”

“I just want her in my life as a friend, Sam,” Bucky groans out.

“ _Sure,_ ” Sam answers back sarcastically, “and I’m the Falcon.”

Bucky shakes his head with a laugh, trying to ignore that his heart speeds up for just a little at the thought of you.

* * *

You aren’t sure why your boss decided to put more on your plate by deciding that you should be the lead representative when it comes to the upcoming Barnes gala. Not only did it remind you too much of a certain  _James Buchanan_ , but you were also starting to feel headaches and annoyance over your current workload. You had so much in your plate already and to just add another set of meetings to it all was maybe going to kill you, at least that’s how you left.

Nevertheless, you went to the first meeting with your half-eaten lunch and order of Starbucks at hand since it was supposed to be a “casual setting”. You couldn’t help but bitterly wonder what that meant for the Barnes family.

You didn’t expect James to be standing in the front in jeans and a nice button with several different people sitting around him. Your eyes quickly land on the floor as you mutter an apology and take the closest seat available.

The meeting is a quick one with people simply introducing themselves, exchanging business cards, and James going on about what he wants from all the companies for the gala and what the group is going to focus on. After half an hour and making rounds once more to thank everyone, you are ready to head out the door, unaware a certain pair of green eyes watching you as James calls out your name.

“I was wondering if I could talk to you for a quick second,” he manages to say as you stand there for a moment unsure, but after avoiding him for so long once more – you own him that much. So, you take a few steps forward, unaware of the door being closed as James gives you a relieved smile.

Blue eyes look into yours and you swear that you stop breathing for a moment as the words finally come out: “I wanted to say I’m sorry.”

“What?”

You weren’t sure what you were expecting as your heart deflates for a moment. James’ eyes move down as his hands play with a small, white figure in the back of his wrist that are linked to his shirt. You aren’t sure what it is, but it seems to calm him down before he keeps moving forward with his explanation.

“I just wanted to say ‘m sorry,” his accents slips as his eyes darken and you almost feel his sincerity, “I unloaded a lot on you when it might’a ‘ve been too much.”

“Oh,” is all you manage to say as you watch him keep playing with those cuff links you are assuming, “It’s okay, Bucky. Everyone needs someone to talk to, but next time give me a warning, will ya?”

You laugh lightly as Bucky feels the tension that he had been holding in his heart disintegrate. He was happy to have you in his life once more, but he also wanted to get to know you better. So, as you calm down, Bucky moves forward with the second part of his plan.  

“Hey, I was wondering if anyone has shown you around New York yet,” Bucky questions as you think about it for awhile before shaking your head. Aside from going around your neighborhood, you haven’t really gone outside of Manhattan since you were usually catching up on your sleep or getting caught up with whatever else the twins had in mind.

“Let me show you around,” James states and that excited but shy smile that you had gotten used (and missed) to seeing during the weekends bloom once more on his face. However, your mind fought your heart wondering if he was just going to turn it into a rich pity fest once more.

You frown and he catches, only to stutter out: “J-Just hanging out. No thinking about family or work,  _nada._  I promise you, doll.”

You pause for a moment at the nickname he gives, but he doesn’t seem to notice as his blue eyes sparkle so you can give him a chance. And you don’t want to, there are so many reasons why you shouldn’t from all the rom-coms that you had watched growing up, but your heart was a traitorous fool that wanted Bucky by your side, even if only for a little while.

“Sure,” you end up saying with a tense smile, though that all seems to change just as quickly when James get a full-blown smile on his lips. 

Goodness, you were both complete idiots.


	7. the way feelings go.

_“Are you telling me that’s the girl Bucky can’t stop thinking of?”_

_“The exact one.”_

_“Well, no wonder the date was a failure. You should see the eyes he was making at her.”_

_“He’s not in love,” Steve remarks as green eyes look at him in disbelief, “His words not mind.”_

_“That poor deluded bastard.”_

* * *

You aren’t sure what to think about Bucky and his invasion from before, as the weekend comes closer and he sends you a message to meet near the library close to the Barnes Towers. You are sure it is just meant as a friendship sort of thing and as much as you feel a certain type of disappointment with it all, you are just happy to have Bucky back in your life – maybe, he’ll bring another dog with him too.

You weren’t sure if in the eleventh hour, you should be freaking about what you should be wearing or enjoying stuffing your face with pizza on the couch and looking for something to watch.   

“What do you think that you should be doing right now?” Wanda asks like she knows your inner turmoil, as she watches you hang up from ordering from your favorite pizza place. She is currently putting on some extra earrings, to match her silver heels and red dress for a night out on the town with Viz.

“I think,” you sigh out, “I should forget about this and fantasizing over being Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman again.”

“Richard Gere again?” she questions as she takes a seat across from you and the shitty little thing you call a kitchen countertop.

“Peek Richard Gere,” you correct her as she laughs. You pout for a second, waiting for the second show to drop as Wanda enters mother hen mode.

“If it’s just as friends, just be casual and happy you,” Wanda explains her point-of-view, “If not, maybe you should–”

“I don’t want him like that, Wan,” you whisper as brown eyes give you a sympathetic look.

“I didn’t spend a whole month see you mope over this Borky for you to lie to me,” Wanda fights back, before cupping your cheek so that you could look at her straight in the eyes. You let keep going though you want to correct her and oh so many things, “But, if denial makes it easier for you, and I’ll gladly help with that–”

“But?”

“But,” she starts off once more with a sympathetic smile, “If being around someone hurts you, you can always cut them off. It’s always in your power to do so.”

“I know,” you remark, thinking about why you followed with your plans from moving to New York from Syracuse in the first place, as she smiles and nods once more before the doorbell rings. Maybe, Viz was here to finally pick her up.  

She gets up from her place and grabs her bag before looking at you once more: “Enjoy your 90’s movie binge.”

“I’ll try!” you yell back as she disappears through the small hallway and you are left once alone.

Now, you aren’t so sure if you could watch the damn movie without thinking of how much Richard Gere’s character reminded you of one Bucky Barnes, though you weren’t exactly Julia Roberts. Eventually, you decide on watching  _Top Gun_  instead and ignoring that denial could be an island of one.

* * *

As you binge on old 90’s movies to forget your anxiety over tomorrow, you are completely unaware that there is another person pushing all the details that he loves about New York into the itinerary for tomorrow with a lovestruck look on his face – though he’ll deny it when asked by Steve or Sam. However, with a certain red-head, it is a completely different story.

> _“So, I am guessing she’s the reason our date went so bad,” Nat gives him a small smile, though there are no bad feelings behind it, “The one Steve told me about.”_
> 
> _“Stevie doesn’t know what he’s talkin’ about,” Bucky remarks as Natasha gives him a skeptical look, “She’s just a friend.”_
> 
> _Natasha tries her hardest to stop herself from singing the second part to a certain song, as she proceeds to shrug: “Sure, but just remember you’re just going to have the same problem again.”_
> 
> _“I know that,” Bucky remarks in frustration as he pushes a hand through his face, “But, it isn’t like that…I don’t see her in that way.”_
> 
> _Natasha just shakes her head before stating that she has to go back to work and back to seeing Clint, because as least she didn’t have the rich kid problems that came with being one James Buchanan Barnes._

Bucky drives the memory from his head before moving forward with what you guys should have for lunch.

* * *

You end up meeting Bucky in the steps of one of older libraries in New York City. The weather is slightly cooler than usual and are falling asleep on the couch after crying over The Green Mile for the what seems like the 20th time, you end up taking a quick shower and picky a breezy open top, a light sweater,  and jeans. You aren’t sure what the day is going to entail, but as you see Bucky wearing a simple flannel button up and jeans with Lucas at his side, you can’t help but secretly rejoice over your choice of clothing.

I mean, you didn’t want to seem desperate to the man.  

“Morning,” you exclaim with a grin as the large dog perks up for a second, and for a second with those big blue eyes staring at you and you can’t help but hope that Bucky is as well.

“Hey,” Bucky breathe out, as you take a step down and greet Lucas as well. He can’t help but grin at the sight of the dog leaning into your touch before you get up once more and look at him prepared to start the day.

“So, where are we going, oh great tour guide?” you laugh just a little and Bucky can’t help but feel that butterflies in his stomach as his heart speeds up for just a second.

“The Planetarium,” Bucky manages to answer back, as you nod while motioning for Lucas to follow you. The dot agrees to do so with a bark, as Bucky stays in the back.

And as the three of you walk the busy streets of New York, Bucky can’t help but feel like this is going to end up being a very bad idea.

* * *

Bucky ends up taking to around Central Park, his favorite bookstore, and a very good pizza place not too far from Madison Square Garden. You also got to know more about Bucky – about he has gone a few tours when he was younger, how he got connected to the Service Dog Academy he worked with after he came back (as you took Lucas back), and even a little about his family and how he grew up in Brooklyn with his best friend. In exchange, you talked about Wanda and Pietro and how you moved around a lot before settling in Syracuse for the rest of your school, though you didn’t talk much about what lead you to New York. 

“Do you like dancing?” Bucky remarks as the afternoon slowly turns into evening and while you had never been the best dancer, you can’t help but want to try it out with Bucky. **  
**

“Here and there,” you remark vaguely as Bucky smiles, grabbing your hand and dragging you down the sidewalk.

That’s how you end up at a place called [C’mon Everybody.](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.timeout.com%2Fnewyork%2Fbars%2Fcmon-everybody&t=NDVhYWQ3NWQzMWRmZDA5MzkyODVkZDFhYjUzOTY1NDhjYWIzZmU1MCxjYTNQNDlpZQ%3D%3D&b=t%3ARX4SnYt_TIYMwvxNWhVbfA&p=http%3A%2F%2Fthe-canary.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F183757118811%2Fbel-ami-bb-6&m=1)

 

It’s a quaint little place that seems to be playing a little bit of everything tonight, completely different from that other club where you had meet Bucky before you knew him. However, instead of standing at the sidelines, he quickly grabs a small table, orders drinks, and quickly moves you to the dance floor. You aren’t familiar with some songs, but you do your best with Bucky’s instructions.

It’s a fast twirl of laughs and bad dance moves, as you move from one song to another, quite unsure of where all of this is going but if Bucky is happy you are as well. It hits you like a rock and at that moment, Bucky dips you.

The world pauses and shrinks to the two of you in the darkly lit room, as your eyes meet blue eyes and you realize just how close your face is. Because if you move your face in the right angle, you swear that you could capture his lips with yours and–

**That’s when the song comes to an end.**

“I have to use the bathroom,” you admit and thus breaking the moment as Bucky lets you go. You run to where the restrooms are indicated to be, as Bucky starts to move towards the table once more. His breathing was a bit heavier than usual, as he tried to calm down whatever adrenaline and emotions he was feeling from that dance.

“Fuck,” he curses to himself, “What the hell was that?”

Bucky knew deep down what it was, everyone had been telling him so for months but now he was finally facing the realization that he really was attracted to you – he wasn’t sure what to do.

He really couldn’t do anything about it, unless he wanted a Dot incident all over again. Bucky runs a hand through his hair in frustration over his idiocy and just how much he might actually like you. It’s another twenty whole minutes before you come out of the bathroom and by that time he has already called a cab for you.

“W-What?” you manage to stutter out, as Bucky pushes you towards the front of the dance hall. Your heart is jumping in anxiety and fear over what had happened, but you didn’t think that his reaction would have been so negative.

“I-I just realized I have a long day tomorrow,” Bucky remarks trying not to look at your soft lips and watering eyes, “I’m sorry I can’t take you home, but it’s better that way.”

_It’s better this way._

The familiar and all too heartbreaking phase causes to you freeze and move forward without another word, as Bucky pushes you into the cab with a weary smile but you aren’t looking at him anymore. You give the man your address and Bucky spots him a hundred before giving you a brief goodbye. He tries to grab your hand but you pull back and say goodnight.

“I’m sorry,” he states, though he isn’t sure if he is saying it for you or for himself as he begins to close the door.

“No,” he hears you whisper, “You aren’t.”

You pull the door to close completely as the cab drives off. You’re left in hurt and confusion as to whether James Barnes was just playing with to begin with or if he just realized he was wasting his time, as you try your hardest not to cry on the way back home.

Bucky is left standing there on the sidewalk, unsure of what to do next but he knows everything is more fucked up than it should be now.


	8. how lonely is love.

_“So, you’re telling me the room shrunk,” Sam rants off with a laugh, “It was only you and her.”_

_“Shut up, Wilson,” Bucky groans back, trying to forget the sad look in your eyes._

_“Shit Barnes, you have it bad,” Sam states, though he leaves out the last part to himself._

_Bucky doesn’t say anything as he keeps staring into space, trying to forget his stupid mistake and those stupid set of rules – only for Sam to throw a pillow that lands straight on his face._

* * *

Wanda doesn’t say anything when you come to your face red and blotchy as you go into the kitchen and grab the strongest drink you have from behind one of the cabinets. She keeps watch, as you come into the small living room and for a moment she is glad that Viz had left early, he had the emotional deposition of a robot at times though he meant well.

She takes a step closer to you and you take a step back before opening and chugging a drink from the large bottle, “Can you please call Pietro so I have someone’s ass to kick in Mortal Kombat?”

Wanda wants to laugh and joke about the incident, but the dark looks stop her. However, she doesn’t say anything as you move around her and go into the hallway that leads to your room.

“You don’t cry like that over just friends, dummy,” she murmurs to herself, wondering what had happened to that girl that had promised to lock up her heart after a certain incident back home and what was so great about a certain James Barnes.

* * *

“You look like someone killed your puppy,” Natasha can’t help but remark after the end of another mini meeting between all the companies within Barnes Tower. And while last time, she had seen a certain man smiling and shyly looking away from the representative for Fury’s company – James wasn’t even looking in her direction anymore.

It had only helped a little that she has been called in the middle of the meeting for work, though James kept on lingering on where she had been sitting like some lovestruck teenager.

“Nat,” Bucky remarks as if trying to reprimand her but she doesn’t really care nor does she find it threatening.

“What did you do this time, Barnes?” she asks, ignoring him and moving with her own set of questions though Sam had already given her some information. However, there was something missing from everything she had seen and understood.

“I fucked up,” is all he can manage to say, as he once again plays with the marshmallow cufflinks at the edges of his suit. Nat can’t help but raise a perfectly shaped eyebrow because in all her time that she had known Bucky –before and after his time in the army– he was never one to admit when he was wrong or when he was sorry.

However, things had changed since high school and Dot, hell things had changed since their own date a few months back and Natasha could only really pinpoint it to one thing – that gal from Fury’s company.

He lets out a small, self-deprecating laugh before finally turning to look at her as he went on with his story of what had happened that weekend – how he showed her to all the places he loved and how they dance and when he realized just how pretty she looked in the lightning and how he just wanted to kiss.

It was then that he remembered about his mother and everything that could go to hell if he gave in, so he pushed her and the look on her face–

“You threw her away or worst that you’re playing with her,” Nat pushes his right shoulder with a hard jab, “She probably thinks you’re playing with her, you dumbass!”

“I–”

“You don’t mean it that way,” Nat explains, already two steps ahead of him, “But, people don’t understand that if you’re inside your own head the whole time, James.”

Bucky sighs before running a hand down his face in frustration. Nat stands in front of him with her arms crossed over her chest and a serious look on her face, that he swore could have killed him once or twice by now.

“I am getting a feeling that this isn’t like Dot or even me,” Nat starts off in an even tone, “But, you have to keep your priorities in order – if you want to help your mom and sisters, you can keep dragging this poor woman alone.”

“And if I just want to be happy?”

“Well, then you have to think about whether this is all worth it,” Nat remarks with a shrug like it’s the easiest thing in the world, but all Bucky can do is groan in annoyance over his own stubbornness and stupidity.

* * *

Too bad for Bucky, you were already making certain choices to protect your own heart.

“Are you sure about this?” Pietro can’t help but ask, on the second night of you two playing video games, as he watches your hand hover over a certain phone number.

 _“Self-care,_ ” is all you do to answer back, as he shakes his head. You hit the block button and move back to playing the game with Pietro before taking a sip of your drink.

You were done of getting your heart being played with for another person’s amusement.


	9. when love passes you by.

_“So, what this is the end?”_

_“She hasn’t talked to me since that weekend,” Bucky groans miserably, “Doesn’t answer my messages or anything. I just don’t know anymore.”_

_“Maybe,” Steve drawls out as he pets the puppy’s ear, much to her delight, “You should finally get your head out’a your ass and fight for what you really want instead of followin’ some blasted will.”_

_“You know what, Rogers…”_

* * *

 

Winnie knows that there is something peculiar about today when her son calls her and Rebecca to meet him for breakfast on a Friday. James had never been a morning person, even with the nightmares and everything that came with rehab it was still hard to wake him up before 10am. It was only recently, just this past summer, that he was slowly getting into the groove of things.

The three of them end up meeting at his favorite pancake place -- the one they used to take him every birthday when they still lived in Brooklyn. And while, Winnie loves her son, there are details and fabrics that she still needs to pick out for the gala event just a few weeks away now. But, at the sight of James’ frown and his hands are being clenched together.

“Jamie, what is this all about?” Becca asks from the side, not as update on her brother’s romantic endeavor and strife as their mother was. Bucky lets out a shaky sigh before giving his ma an awkward but boyish smile -- one that she hasn’t seen in years and that’s all it takes for Winnie to confirm it as Bucky moves forward with his speech.

Her son is head over heels in love again, even if he denies it a bit more than he should.

* * *

 

Wanda doesn’t expect to be opening the door so early in the morning on a week, especially when she didn’t have to go to work or see Viz just yet. She almost yells for you, whose room is closer to the opening of the apartment, to get up and open the door when a quick thought flashes through her mind.

_You weren’t at home right now._

Actually, you had been spending almost every other night back in Pietro’s studio or just hanging out with him. It wasn’t that you were together or anything, but two her older brother you were like a second younger sister and he knew well enough that once your heart broke --they had both seen it multiple times before-- you tended to shut yourself off from the rest of the world. However, this wasn’t Syracuse where you could hide and pretend that there was nothing to do, so instead Pietro was bringing the world --all of NYC-- to you in a small attempt to complete shut them out.

She had even promised to meet the two of you a little later on in the afternoon go to to a farmers market that had caught your interest -- after she caught up with her sleep, though with that knocking to the front door it didn’t seem possible for now. So, with a grumble, Wanda gets up and marches rather annoyed to the door.

“ **I swear if--** ” Wanda opens the door with a swear at the tip of her tongue when she stops, in admonishment to see who it is. Blue eyes meet brown ones as Wanda’s anger returns back two-fold at the sight of the familiar face --that she had only seen through stalking social media-- that had hurt her dear friend.

Bucky is about to say something, but she closes the door right on his face before turning back around and heading back to bed.

“Hey, hey,” Bucky bangs on the door as Wanda lets out a sigh before stepping into the kitchen, “Can I at least talk to her? _Please.”_

Wanda can’t help but smile just a little at the sound of desperation coming out of his voice, though she can’t help but notice that it almost sounds the same as to how your own sounded when you had come back from your “friend date” -- which was utter bullshit, anyone could tell that there was something stronger than that but at the simple idea, you ran like a scared fawn. She was sure James Barnes had his own set of problems and as Wanda thought more about it, the more she decided she needed to hear them out -- she needed to know what in all the seven hells he would push you of all people away.

The knocking stops and Wanda makes a short run towards the front door again, pulls it open and is meet with a very confused and maybe even a little scared looking at her direction from the hallway. She points at him and he blinks.

“If you even care an ounce of her well-being,” Wanda starts off her threat as the air changes, like she is challenging something darker inside her for just a second, “You better get your ass in here and explaining yourself.”

“I don’t have--” Bucky starts off, trying to fight back but Wanda just raises an eyebrow.

“Yeah, you do,” Wanda answers back a bit miffed, “Without me giving you a chance, she’s not gonna answer your phone calls or text.”

James freezes and he knows it’s the truth. In all the time that he had been trying to contact you since that disaster, you hadn’t answered much less replied to them. Bucky knew he deserved it, but he missed it all now that you weren’t there -- the sound of your laugh, the little smile you threw his way, the way that he just forget about the rest of the world and his cares when he was around you.

Bucky Barnes had experienced a lot of things in his life, but this was something familiar yet completely new that he wanted to know more about, to know and spend more time with you if that was even still possible. And if this red-haired woman wa stating that she was his only chance, though whatever means Bucky was willing to move forward and enter the little apartment.

Wanda lets him in and then when he struck with the little placements and decoration that he is sure are you or have you smiling in a picture -- much younger and carefree than you are now. Wanda stands to the side and closes the door as she watches with a critical eye as Bucky takes everything. He decides to speak after a few minutes.  

“Can you tell me where she is then?” James can’t help but ask, as Wanda decides to strike a blow -- if just to make herself feel better.

“ _With someone_ ,” she answers back with a teasing tone in her voice, as James ends up biting his bottom lip for just a moment as if frustrated and concerned over who that someone could be, “But, I might see her later.”

“Well, I was hopin’ to explain myself,” Bucky states bashfully as Wanda takes a seat on the couch. Her hand extending her hand to point to the opposing loveseat.

“Better start practicing then, huh?” Wanda smiles, as Bucky takes in a wide gulp of hair -anxiety building for just a moment-- before moving with his own story in the early morning hours.

* * *

 

However, unlike with Bucky and Wanda, Pietro already knew your story like the back of his hand. A little girl whose parents work made her move a bit too much, who clung to the first person that connected with her -- and sometimes that didn’t lead to the best results as people broke your heart over and over again. By the time, he and Wanda had meet you back in college, you were a closed book but with some struggle you slowly open yourself once again -- only to have love crush your heart once more.

Now, you were in the percipience of having it shattered all over again and losing yourself off completely to the man Pietro simply as “Bucky”, which was a really stupid name but as he took you around town and made you remember why you had come to New York in the first place -- well the smile he was so familiar with was slowly coming back. However, both Maximoff twins share a common personality trait -- that they were both willing to hit, metaphorically speaking, above the head to make you realize your shortcomings.

Pietro was just about to do that, as you sat in small part in Williamsburg, eating ice cream after you had picked up some things here and there from the local shops.

“So, are you in love?” he states before taking a spoonful of ice cream and eating it. You pause and look at him, frozen

“Maybe,” you admit sadly, but awareness was the first step to anything as Pietro’s old man use to say when he was still around. However, you were still frowning and that wasn’t a good thing.

“Please,”Pietro teases as he places an arm over your shoulder,  “Are we really going to have that Hercules moment again?”

“Piet,” you turn and look at him with pout,  “Please don’t sing.”

Pietro laughs and as he closes his eyes and moves his head back at just the right angle, that’s when you see _them_ \-- Wanda and a certain blue-eyed man (who is carrying a white box) that you couldn’t escape from. At your sudden silence, Pietro turns around and sees the same thing and while he might understand the look Wanda is giving him, you still his top priority.

“Do you want to talk to him?” Pietro asks in a serious tone as you glance at him. You shake your head and end up standing up, both Wanda and Bucky freeze as you turn to meet clear blue eyes as he gives you a hesitant smile. You shake your head before turning to walk in the other direction.

You can’t let your heart be played with again, but you as you walk deeper into the park you don’t notice that someone is running right after -- that he isn’t willing to give up and though he doesn’t deserve it he wants to properly explain himself because deep down he was just as heartbroken as you -- but, you were slowly mending that, just like he was doing for you. 

Now, if you could just stop being idiots about the whole thing. 


	10. love makes the burns heal faster.

_ “Why did you let him go after her?” Pietro asks brotherly duty and caution all rolled into one, as the Maximoff twins sit in the park and wait. _

_ “I heard his story,” Wanda explains as she takes a sip of her coffee, “He might be stupid, but I think he genuinely cares for her...wants to be with her.”  _

_ Pietro stays silent because both of them know what the other is thinking and his younger sister is trying to ease him that it won’t be like the last time -- it won’t be like the event that trapped you into Syracuse more than it should have.  _

_ “He won’t play with her like Rumlow did.”  _

_ Pietro really does want to believe that because above all else, you deserve some happiness in your life. _

* * *

“Would you please stop following me?” you tell behind you as Bucky seems to be catching up. While you had a running start, James has kept running until he was only a few meters away but he didn’t want to grab your attention by force -- if you wanted to stop and talk, that’s when he would do so. 

“Will you please listen to me then?” he lets out in mild desperation before taking a deep breathe watching you stop. You turn to look at him, as blue eyes meet your own, as he waits for something...anything in order to make his next move. 

“Well…” you pause to take a deep breathe, “What do ya want to talk about?” 

You swear you don’t stop breathing over the relieved smile on his face as he takes as few steps closer to you, though he doesn’t completely engulf in a hug like he wants to. Bucky also doesn’t tell you how much he had missed you since you stopped talking to him, how happy he is just to be in the same space as you because even if you’re cautious and reserve over everything you’re still shining like when he first met you -- you have been this whole damn time. 

And overall, Bucky was a goddamn idiot for not realizing that he has been in love with you this entire time, but he knew he couldn’t unload all that onto you -- as Steve and Natasha had told him so before he went through all this. He didn’t have the right to after ignoring you for so long and you certainly didn’t have to deal with all the doubt his mother and Becca threw at him -- they had seen him “in love” before and it never ended well.

So for now he just smiles and pulls something out of his pocket, “I just wanted to say ‘m sorry.”

“For what?” you bit back, wanting to hear from his mouth what he could be sorry for. 

“For acting like a complete jerk and sending you off when we were having such a nice outing,” Bucky answers back as you give him a small nod, “And for ignoring you when I had no reason to, I’ve been acting like a child.” 

“Most rich boys do,” you answer back like you know all too well, which causes James to frown for just a second, “But, if you’re willing to let bygones be bygones, then I’m okay with it.” 

“Yeah,” Bucky grins before outstretching his hand to show you what he has taken out of his pocket. Your eyes widen at the sight of a small white cartoon character at the center of the chain, but you don’t laugh and Bucky considers that a small victory.

“What is that?” 

“An apology gift,” he answers back as you grab it from him and just try your hardest not to laugh at such a strange but cute mascot, “Do you accept it?” 

“Sure,” you can’t help but laugh, as his blue eyes take in your smile completely. 

And as you walk back to where the Maxmioff twins are, you try to move forward with what you have and try to ignore --for now-- the bigger problems at hand.

* * *

With that, it’s a bit smoother during the preparation meetings for the gala -- you are more vocal and everyone seems to be willing to listen to the ideas you set on the table. Nat always seems to agree with you in some way and Bucky can’t help but grin at the sight of you being more vocal and especially when he sees the little figure from swinging around your wrist from time to time. 

However, in the middle of your presentation during the latest meeting that all stops as Winnie and someone else set into the office. Blue eyes meet dark ones, as the scan the whole room before landing on you and Natasha. At the sight, something akin to fear and anger ripples in the back of his head while his mother begins to speak. 

“James, I would like you to meet the newest member of the gala committee,” she starts off, “...Brock Rumlow.” 

The whole room falls dead at the sight of his grin.  


	11. steps along the way.

_Brown eyes watch like a predator would their neck meal. She pretends not to see a she turns to move more towards the Barnes kid. He didn’t think he would be so lucky, he just needs to find the right moment._

_Green eyes keep watch from the back, making sure that everything keeps running smoothly and waiting for her own moment as well...should the need arise._

* * *

 

It’s a strange sight, watching you move to and from one office to another as you get the final preparations for the gala ready. However, it isn’t because you are avoiding James now -- it’s quite the opposite actually as you stay as close as possible when a certain man comes into the office now and then. However, Bucky can see that brown eyes do the same thing as well -- they roam you and wherever you are and you keep your head down. 

James isn’t sure what to feel about all this, but he is sure that you and Rumlow (new and obnoxious money that his mother had brought in for connections in Upper New York) know each other, he just needs to find out how and what the hell did he do to you because this demure and quiet version of you is something that Bucky can’t stand. 

* * *

 

The Maximoffs don’t know that Rumlow has entered your life once more. You have always been quiet and enduring in the things you had suffered under the man and it seemed that he still had that effect on you, as both Wanda and Pietro have their own angry remarks (cursing in a different language and suddenly getting agitated) when Bucky tells them what has been going on at the meetings. 

James is silent, but slowly seething is rage as Pietro -who always knows you better-- begins to tell the story. 

“They had some classes together back in college,” he states while looking at through the window though his hands constantly keep moving together to keep him busy, “She helped tutor people whenever they needed help. She started helping Rumlow because he was just awful at everything, but throwing his money around.” 

Blue meets slate gray eyes as Pietro frowns, “ He was nice one second, but the moment the moment she turned her down -- Rumlow made her life a living hell. He called, harassed her, had other people bully her just because she didn’t want anything to do with him.”   

“She took a whole semester off after a couple of gals almost threw her down the stairs,” Wanda adds, “Rumlow eventually dropped out, but she is still scared to come back.  She shut everyone out and was too scared to move anywhere else, thinking that she--”

“That she would meet Rumlow again,” Pietro finished off, as Bucky claps his hands together, “We told her to come and look what happens.” 

The three of them sit there in the restaurant  for a good while, unsure of what the next step could be and what exactly to do about Rumlow, especially if he started actively looking for you once more.   

* * *

 

You, on the other hand, were moving things forward and thinking of ideas that could better serve the charity gala. Deep down, you knew that it was really about the richest women in the city getting to meet James -- Nat had told you so, but that didn’t mean that you couldn’t do some real good as well especially for the causes that were important to him.

Yes, seeing Rumlow again was scary thing but there were bigger fish to fry -- namely, the dark-haired woman sitting across from you in a sunny cafe a few blocks from the Barnes Tower. It had taken you some time to get a meeting with her, but while Winnie thought you were going to declare your unending love for her son, like so many young women had done before -- you were sitting in front of her with a pamphlet and charts in regards to a certain service dog organization. 

“What is all this?” she can’t help but ask as you take a quick sip of your cup. 

“I know there isn’t one solid foundation that the gala money is going to,” you explain as she fiddles with the pamphlet, “So, I thought to throw in my hat for an organization I have come to love since coming to New York.” 

She stays quiet, blue eyes glancing over the piece of paper you had gotten the last time you had visited. You can’t help but wonder if she is thinking about James, but shrug off -- this was something larger that needed all your attention at the moment. 

 “They help a lot of people, Mrs. Barnes,” you explain before pulling out your laptop, “Especially someone you hold dear. So, don’t you think that you should just look into them, even just a little?” 

Winifred Barnes frowns at your declaration, but stays sitting so you proceed with the rest of your presentation with a smile on your face. 

* * *

 

You aren’t quite sure what is going on when James tells you that there isn’t going to be a meeting today, that  he had ordered everyone --including Rumlow-- to leave early and take some time from throwing away all his family’s money.

You frown at the joke, as Bucky lets out a nervous chuckle before leading you down to the main entrance and into the back of a black-tinted car. You almost don’t enter the blasted thing, but then he does that thing--

“Just humor me,” James lets out in a stressed chuckle as he pushes a hand through his hair and you can’t help but think that he is slowly starting to read you like an opened book -- the thought scares just a bit. However, at the sight of those sparkling blues, well you really can’t say no.

“The moment I want to go home--”

“I’ll take you right back,” he finishes your sentence, as you just stare at him for a moment before getting inside and  start being driven farther from the heart of Manhattan. 

Bucky grins and your heart doesn’t stop _thumping_ the whole way there. 

You end up staring at the bright lights from the car window, completely unaware of who was staring at you the entire time. 

Though, he ends up laughing at the sight of your wide eyes at where he has the two of you stop, though completely unsure of how you might take the whole thing, but after everything you had done for him thus far – he knew you deserve some pampering.

 

 


	12. i came here just to see you.

Bucky can’t stop thinking about it after he leaves you at your apartment. You had been shining from the small spa treatment (after a lot of convincing in his part for you to just do the damn thing) that he had taken you after work, but in those dresses -- that’s when you really shined and he couldn’t keep his eyes off you.   

“I look pretty,” you can’t help but remark, as you twirl around in the mirror with a giddy laugh (after slightly more convincing). Blue eyes keep watching you the entire time. He hadn’t seen you this happy since before his stupid actions when he had started to feel more than friendly affection towards her. 

He was still your friend, but he was slowly realizing that he wanted more than that. There was an itch, never-ending loneliness, to be by your side but now he was paying the price for his rash behavior.    

_“You’re gorgeous,_ ” Bucky breathes out, completely lost at the sight of you. He could understand why Rumlow has wanted to by his side, but Bucky promised himself to never stoop that low with his time or money to grab your attention.

“You think so?” there’s a dark look in your eyes, as you turn to look at the man. 

It’s then Bucky realizes that you had heard him. He feels bashful and childish for getting caught saying such a thing, but he knows better than to pull back from this feeling now. His blue eyes meet yours as all he can do is nod with a soft  _ yeah  _ on his lips.

His heart flutters non-stop as you grin before turning back to look at more dresses. Bucky doesn’t push back when you lean in a bit more during your quick dinner at a local diner. Nor does he stop you when you give him a quick peck on the cheek as you towards your apartment building at the end of it all. 

He hasn’t felt like this in a very long time and Bucky considers a huge idiot for trying to ignore this feeling for so long. 

* * *

 

On the other side of town, Winnie Barnes is slowly realizing a whole bunch of things. Since her husband’s death and maybe since her son had come back from war, she had been expecting a certain type of person to come back -- a Bucky that was as troublesome as he was charismatic, while willing to take over his family’s company. Maybe, Bucky had seen that too, but he knew that after coming back from his war tours that he simply couldn’t be that man anymore. 

Through the small falls and triumphs, Winnie had hoped that she could one day have her son back -- faults and everything as long as he could smile like he used to.  

He never did and so, Winnie and by extension, his sisters wrapped him in plastic wrap as best as they could. What the woman hadn’t realized was that her son, regardless of how slow and how much it hurt, had moved forward with trying to rebuild his life as best as he could. 

> _ “Your son is stronger than you think,” the young woman remarks like she knows Bucky better than her, “I’ve never seen him happier than when he was with those dogs. Maybe...maybe, you could consider giving back to them.”  _

Winnie lets out a shaky sigh as she stares at the photos and brochures that she had been given to take home. However, what grabbed her heart the most was the photo of Bucky and a dog by the name of Daisy if she remembered correctly. 

Bucky was smiling and laughing so hard that it reminded her of his youth. 

Her James was still there, but he was stronger than before as well -- she had just never seen it. 

* * *

Rumlow thinks he has the chance to talk to her when they are both walking down to the last meeting before the gala. The man had been waiting for the perfect time to seize his pet once more. 

He had just been throwing his money around when Mrs. Barnes came along, but the utter terror in her face had been worth all the spent cash when they first saw each other. But, that was it -- she was watched like a hawk by both the Barnes boy and the redhead since they made contact. 

This wasn’t college where he could buy people out as easily, but everyone had a price and with a few bills, he could get some people to keep those two occupy. 

“ _ You really gonna keep ignorin’ me _ ?” he asks from the back of her. She freezes for a moment before she keeps moving further towards the room where they are bound to be locked together and that when Rumlow with strike -- to finally get the one thing that had escaped him back in college. 

At least, that’s what he thinks will happen until he sees Winnie Barnes and a man standing there with her. He clicks his tongue in annoyance before he keeps walking forward -- the sight of the old brood inflating all the fun he was planning on having. 

He doesn’t look at Mrs. Barnes or the man, but he can feel it. Rumlow can feel the tension leave the air as the wrack of sobs echoed in the hallway as he moves towards the elevator. 

He takes the wonderful sound in as he sees her slump forward into the older woman from the corner of his eye. 

This is more than enough for now. He still had plans brewing for the gala night after all.

* * *

It’s scary how your world can crash and burn all over one person. It had happened once before to you thank Rumlow and as you felt the man behind you -- it was happening once more. However, you weren’t what happened in the end when you saw Winnie Barnes and your boss, Nick Fury, standing near the opening of the meeting room that he pushed forward. 

However, deep down, you knew that you had averted something for now and that’s when your fear shattered. You knew how unprofessional it was to be crying in front of your boss and you didn’t know how Mrs. Barnes felt about all this.

But, at that moment, all you cared about was sweet relief and maybe Winnie understood that in some way, as she tries to comfort you as a mother would. 

“Hey, hey. What happened?” a familiar voice comes in after a few minutes clearly out of breath, as you let out a shaky sigh. 

You look up and your world realigns itself once more at the sight of familiar blue eyes.

You realize in that moment how deep certain feelings run right at that moment.  

 


End file.
